As a child I was very afraid of angels. It was mostly that I was afraid of aliens, and angels seemed eerily similar to aliens: too many eyes canonically, very bright, filled with lore. I did not like the idea of entities that could arrive and communicate with us at any time. I did not like that the angels were so terrifying looking that they had to say, "Be not afraid" whenever they appeared. I did not like that E.T. quivered so much. It is a fear that as an adult I recognize as mostly a fear of the unknown, the uncontrollable. Now I am only really afraid of voices in the Appalachian woods and uncanny urban legends that allow me to believe that these kind of encounters may be possible. But I still would not like to meet an angel or an alien.
This has been a big week for bravery for me as it was Wings Week on this website, and I kept expecting angels to appear. I was also reading Marie-Helene Bertino's Beautyland, which was recommended to me by several people here, and which I found so enchanting that after I finished it last night I had to lie down on the floor for a little while because I felt haunted by it and consumed with envy. It is a book about a girl who is an alien, or at least believes she is one. She does not belong, whatever it is. And that's kind of the key to the first half of the book's beauty: Many children believe that they are special, that something must have gone terribly wrong for them to have ended up in such a normal, boring life with normal, boring circumstances and a normal, boring future.
It seemed very likely to me as a child that I would encounter either an alien or an angel in my lifetime. So far, this has not happened. But this week's house seems like a prime location where either could occur. It is in New Mexico, and located a mere four hours by car from Roswell. Four hours is nothing to an angel or an alien. It's in a town called Angelfire. And on top of all of that, this week's house is shaped kind of like a bird! Look at it:
The listing says that it is, "From the angular plan and warped roof planes emulating a bird's wings." Wow! Okay! I can see it.
This house has three bedrooms, four bathrooms, and a whopping 3,450 square feet. It will cost you just under $2 million, and it is made out of LOGS!
This is exciting. We have not seen a full lincoln-log-ass house in a while. And these are fancy logs. The listing promises they are "11-28 inch handcrafted Canadian Engelmann Spruce logs." There is huge variation in 11-28 inches, and you can kind of see that in the walls of this living room.
I do find this very nice. I am usually not a huge fan of "fancy rustic" as an aesthetic, and I do have some questions about what kind of insulation logs provide, but it is gorgeous. These windows are so clean, and the view is fantastic. I do not love the black and white portrait of a horse but luckily that can be removed.
Let's look up!
Ooooooooooh!!! Beautiful!! I like these fake stars, because I love gimmicks. I wish there was a picture of the sky at night so we could see how dark it is. As someone who lives in a light polluted city but grew up in a very un-light polluted exurb, I miss the stars all the time. I would like to see them, and this seems like a great place to stay inside and look at the stars.
Let's see what else there is. Here is the dining room:
There is something upsetting to me about how the logs in this entryway are cut. I think it's because they aren't exactly even. Maybe that's because they needed to be cut before they were installed, but it looks a little janky. I also think the choice to also have wood floors is a huge mistake. Houses need contrast! This could be a beautiful stained concrete instead, or a nice tile.
The same goes for the kitchen table. This house has plenty of wood in the walls, which you cannot really paint nor hang things on easily. It needs other materials.
Let's look at the other view of this room:
The windows in this place are great. I find the narrow ones on that kitchen wall really appealing and fun. It's always nice to see something interesting in a rich person's house because it so rarely happens.
What I don't like is that television showing a photo of the house. I do not think televisions belong in the kitchen.
Here's another view:
Again, I do not love the all wood choices in here, thought these cabinets do look very nice. I have a lot of envy for that giant stove hood because I want a stove hood that actually sucks up smoke.
The counters I hate, and the backsplash I hate. I get that it's hard to maintain a rustic vibe in a counter, but the seams don't even look good. This is a $2 million house. I should not be able to see the seams in those backsplash stones that are 10 feet away!
Here's a bedroom that is off the main living room:
Something I cannot tell is... whether or not this room has a door? It does not appear to have a door? Maybe it could be a pocket door, but then where does it latch? I'm sorry but if a room does not have a door it is not a bedroom. In the 3-D tour, which is very helpfully included in this listing, there is no door to be seen. It feels like it would be better as a library!
But I do have to admit, I love this view!
Gorgeous! Shame there will be no water in the Southwest soon! It does, however, around a very sneaky corner that also does not have a door, have a bathroom:
These cool windows are in here too, which I like. What I don't like is that the bathroom appears to also be carpeted, which is disgusting. Luckily the little room for the toilet, which you cannot see in this photo, does have a door.
Speaking of, let's go back out toward the front door so we can go upstairs:
Wow, that is an exciting and mysterious door. I do love these giant rock floors. That's the kind of difference I was looking for in the main room, and I super love this carved wooden bear that is set up outside to look like he's looking in. What a spooky guy!
Upstairs there is this nice loft:
I like it, and I love that according to the listing that little door on the left is a secret playroom for children that closes up to look like a bookshelf! This is what rich people should be using their money for! I approve!
Unfortunately there is nothing else to see up here so we must go back down to the main floor and then down another flight of stairs. It is not pictured in the slideshow, but on the stairway these people have hung up a magazine feature of their house. Congrats to the house.
Downstairs there is a garage, and then the next room we see is this one:
I hate when a house is clearly staged to sell in a way that makes no sense. These beds in front of that huge closet are upsetting. But it's nice that we have some real walls down here that we could decorate as we liked. There are three extremely boring bathrooms, and another bedroom down here that we will ignore. Here's the second living room:
I do like it when a fancy house has a separate room for the television with a giant sectional. I like to watch a movie!
Also on this floor is this:
I understand that to have a nice laundry room with what appears to be a special bath for dogs is some people's fantasy, but I don't think that means the room has to be as dull as an airport bathroom. At least get those washers and dryers that are a fun color! At least paint this wall! Live a little.
Ultimately, this is a house you aren't buying for the indoor space. You're buying it for the view, and the sky, and the porch.
I do love this view, and I would love to have a cocktail out on this porch. I'm just not sure it's worth $2 million for three tiny bedrooms, one of which doesn't have a door.
This week's house has been listed on Zillow for 141 days at just under $2 million. If you buy this week's house, please invite me. I would like to see the stars.
