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Defector X (formerly Twitter)
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Albert Burneko
Assignment Editor
Connect
albert.burneko@defector.com
@albertburneko
Capital
How To Quit Your Job, According To The Washington Post: Fuck You
519
Comments
Albert Burneko
November 17, 2021
This Is So Stupid
All Of My Problems With The Name “Ultimate”
251
Comments
Albert Burneko
November 16, 2021
Enter Our Raffle To Win A Visit And Home-Cooked Meal From Drew Magary
In 2022, we sent Cardboard Roth and actual Roth to our raffle winner's home. This year, we're sending Drew over, and he's cooking up a feast. Anyone who makes a contribution of at least $20 into our tip jar by Nov. 24 will be entered into the raffle.
Chefector
Let’s Make Some Ravioli
109
Comments
Albert Burneko
November 13, 2021
NBA
Here Are Some Young NBA Players Who Are Butt
274
Comments
Albert Burneko
November 10, 2021
Media Meltdowns
Here Are Some Dishonest Defenses Of Baseball
301
Comments
Albert Burneko
November 2, 2021
NBA
The Celtics Are Crappy And Unhappy
124
Comments
Albert Burneko
November 2, 2021
Chefector
Let’s Cook Mushroom Soup
94
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 30, 2021
NFL
Mark Davis, Big Backpack Guy
230
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 27, 2021
The Machines
Boston Tech Startup Develops Worst Imaginable Way To Get A Cup Of Coffee
382
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 21, 2021
College Basketball
Bob Huggins Wants To Eliminate The Wrong Part Of March Madness
117
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 21, 2021
NBA
Weeks If Not Months In Advance, A Thorough Preview Of The 2021-22 NBA Season
160
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 20, 2021
Chefector
Let’s Make Pierogi
154
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 16, 2021
This Is So Stupid
Reverse Baseball!
130
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 14, 2021
Chefector
Plagiarism Is The Weirdest Of All The Frauds
238
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 12, 2021
Life Lessons
Fake It Until You Make It (A Worse Planet For Everyone To Live On)
321
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 11, 2021
Media Meltdowns
MLB Network’s Jim Kaat Went So Far Out Of His Way To Say Something Racist
153
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 8, 2021
Media Meltdowns
‘American Conservative’ Columnist: This Story Reminds Me Of A Third-Grader Whose Dick I Thought Was Weird
327
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 6, 2021
Chefector
Let’s Cook Some Escarole With Beans And Sausage
84
Comments
Albert Burneko
October 2, 2021
Soccer
All Of What’s Miserable About Barcelona In 2021 Is Congealed Into The Form Of This Doofus
111
Comments
Albert Burneko
September 30, 2021
NBA
BenWatch: Ben Simmons Unmoved By Attempts At Pretending To Placate Him
181
Comments
Albert Burneko
September 28, 2021
Sports Highlight Of The Day
The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is This Aussie Rugby Dude Rescuing A Stuck Sheep
110
Comments
Albert Burneko
September 23, 2021
NFL
Jacksonville Jaguars: No One Is Allowed To Apologize For Sucking Shit Except Us
202
Comments
Albert Burneko
September 20, 2021
Chefector
Let’s Throw Together Some Stuffed Peppers
114
Comments
Albert Burneko
September 18, 2021
Life's Rich Pageant
Urban Meyer’s House Is Freaking Me Out, Man
324
Comments
Albert Burneko
September 17, 2021
MLB
Please Explain To Me What The Hell Aaron Boone Is Trying To Say About Derek Jeter
153
Comments
Albert Burneko
September 8, 2021
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